Trich.

Rainbow I captured on a dog walk the other day

I feel so proud that I've completed 2 and a half weeks of my training and there's no sign of me losing interest or giving up. I really really really want to complete this goal I've set for myself. And writing everything down has been so insanely helpful. I know no one is reading this except Stuart but that is totally fine! It has helped to keep me focused and I'm going to stick with it.

Every day when I sit down to start writing my blog, I'm like "Derrrr, I have nothing to write about today..." but when I start writing, I realize that I had more to say that I thought.

There's another thing I've been trying to overcome, kinda personal, but fuck it! Gotta put it all out there if I want to get past it. I have a sort of habit/OCD/addiction, whatever you want to call it, where I pull out my hair one strand at a time. It's called Trichotillomania, and it's actually pretty common. It started when I was about 14 years old, and I have been doing it on and off ever since. It was REALLY bad when I was a teenager, getting to the point where I had two big bald spots in the back lower part of my scalp. I was able to stop doing it as much after I moved out of my mom's house, which is good, but it's a pretty typical addiction, similar to smoking or nail-biting - it gets worse when I'm stressed, bored, or generally need something to do with my hands.

A few years ago, when Stuart and I lived in New York City, I got to a point where I was determined to stop this habit on my own. I had read a story of a girl who had started this habit when she was 14 like me, and by the time she was 37, had to wear a wig because her hair was so thin and she had damaged her hair follicles. This really got to me, I did tons of research and found things that worked for me. I wore a beanie while in the house, put tape around my fingers, etc and I documented the whole process, taking pictures of where my hair was thinnest every few days so I could see my hair growth. It really helped, and I was able to stop pulling hairs out completely for a year and a half!

Unfortunately, due to stresses of life, having to move in with Stuart's mother for a few months between jobs and other things, I started the habit again. Of course, it depressed me and made me feel like shit about myself that I had failed and obviously that just made me do it more. That was a year and a half ago.

BUT BUT BUT!!! The story doesn't end there. Since I've made the decision to start training for this marathon - I haven't pulled any hairs out for ONE MONTH. I am hoping that it can last again this time, and I think documenting my progress on this blog will help a lot.

Exercise:
30 mins Yoga - (tough one - focused on legs.) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PL9m8spuMQ4 

Food:
9.45am - 1 piece white toast w/ peanut butter + banana,
11am - 2 cups coffee
3pm - 1 large carrot, 1/2 dry smoked salmon fillet
6pm - Quesadillas filled with sweet potato mash, spinach and cheddar cheese with pickled onions *recipe: http://www.health.com/health/recipe/0,,50400000120341,00.html
7pm - cup of earl grey w/ lemon
11pm - cup of earl grey w/ lemon